Wednesday, March 04, 2009

On being anonomyous

I had something else in draft that I was working on, but this thought come to mind as I was surfing the blogs at lunchtime.

I respect the privacy of other bloggers. I am not anonomyous for the simple reason that I am a relative nobody, this blog being my only claim to fame. I am also not anonomyous because I want people to know that I'm a overweight middle aged male who has no desire whatsoever to use my internet presence to cause anyone any harm.

That being said, I realize that some want to remain anonomyous. I understand why the recovery bloggers need to be anonomyous. One of our friends Jenn, of J-Online fame, is shutting down her blog because someone from her life discovered it. Jenn, I respect your decision and though we were online friends for a short time, I will miss your presence.

There was a blog on my list about a year ago called Life of a Valley Girl. The writer "Val" wrote about her personal life in very personal terms. She kept her identity a very closely guarded secret. Someone was working hard to find out who she really was. Val then felt the need to shut it down as this person meant her harm. Not cool.

If you like someone's blog, just enjoy their writing. Don't play detective with their identity. What good does that do you to do that?


Syd said...

Great points here. Anonymity is an important part of AA and Al-Anon. I'm glad that you wrote about that.

Karen said...

You know some people (who think they know it all) use a blog as their alter ego. No, but seriously, some people are able to express themselves without having to worry about hurting someone or being judged for what they say. It's kind of an escape for them.

74WIXYgrad said...

Syd: That's something I take into consideration when I post about another blogger. If they want their identity to be known, let them tell who they are.

Karen:Some people are insecure to the point that they want to express themselves but are afraid of what others will think if they knew who they were. And still others are afraid what they might say online might come back to bite them.

dons_mind said...

good points cliff - but folks also have to remember that when you put yourself out here in internetland, there's really no such thing as 'anonymous' - i'm deadly serious here - any tenth-rate hacker can id anyone within 60 secs out here in this world. you have to be prepared to accept that, or don't put yourself out there.

i'm not implying that hacking someone's id is a good thing or anything like that - but it's a fact of life out here and everyone needs to be aware of it.

Michelle Dawn said...

Sounds like a familar theme.(Pilgram to be exact) I just don't know why people have to be so rude.

clean and crazy said...

gosh Cliff, I usually enjoy reading your blog but this is sad news to me. For anyone out there my name is Suzie and I am an addict. I am proud of my recovery and grateful for my life. I know about being paranoid in cyber space and having someone out there who might want to harm me. However, that being said, someone's anonymity was broken and I respect her privacy and I am sad to hear of the loss to the blogging community. For me Captain Stupid can barely write let alone look on an internet, if he did manage to find me I would be amazed. I am not afraid of who I was or who I am becoming and that has taken a few years to come too.
I know the dangers of internet and the world, fear is one of my biggest character defects. I try not to live in fear today. I wish everyone good times ahead and to choose weather or not to continue to blog is something very personal for each of us. We are all very honest today, at least that is what I read. My choice today is to live, I don't need to explain myself and I don't need to fear who might find out about me today and for that I am grateful. I have freedom to choose today and I love blogging so I will keep coming back.

74WIXYgrad said...

Michelle Dawn:Pilgrim's was a situation where some busybodies where he worked was causing him problems. I didn't see any harm being caused by his blogging and I hang on to hopes that he starts blogging actively again.

CNC: What I like the most about the recovery bloggers is their honesty and I understand fully why they want to keep their honesty under wraps. I feel that folks like Yourself, Jenn, Syd, MsHen, and Mike Golch are doing a great service by letting their struggles known. I feel that one who try to get information that's none of their business are selfish and mean nothing but harm.

Shellmo said...

This makes me think of one blogger that I visit who has her blog open to invited readers only. She was horribly abused and has created a beautiful life for herself. When the blog was just open - some of these harmful people contacted her so she just switched it to private. It's sad - but at least protecting her to some degree.

Busy Bee Suz said...

there are always going to be idiots out there that can't leave well enough alone. usually they do this to deflect their own inadequacies in life onto others.
such a pity.

Michelle said...

Sad to hear that anyone has had to leave something they loved because others spoilt it for them.

Pat Jenkins said...

i bet there is a lot of people out there if given one wish, would simple ask to left alone!

SandyCarlson said...

I share your view on anonymity. I also appreciate that a person named "Sue" who goes by "Devil Dog" has every right to do that and it's really all the same for me. Not for me to judge the circumstances that cause some folks to choose anonymity.

HappyWifeHappyLife said...

I don't use my "real" name on my blog. In large part because I have young children and I try to give them a certain measure of anonymity (which is also the same reason why I don't blog about them much at all....)

Different strokes for different folks.

Hey... by the way, Cliff, I noticed my coffee tasted a little... FUNKY today??!!! :)

Ms Hen said...

I'm not anonymous because in Al-Anon you are allowed to break your own Anonymity (just not anyone elses).

I had to keep secrets as a child; so not as a grown up. I want people to know the face of child abuse and child molestation .. and that I survived and thrived. (and still growing and learning)

My story is so many other women stories that grew up in an alcoholic home.

I am proud and not ashamed. And I want other women to know that too. If my honesty helps other women (or men) that is good; and either way I'm an OPEN BOOK (after having to have secrets as a child).

But no one should break anyone else anonymity. It is a sacred thing; .. and it may affects families and their jobs and all....every case is different.

Betty Ann

Tim Lones said...

All good points. On my own blogs, I use my own name because frankly I dont feel the need to be anonymous. That being said, I have put very little about my personal life because that isnt what Cleveland Classic Media is about..The old saying goes "It's not about me" (and it isnt)..My other Blog I started as a way to share mine and my wife's life experiences with others, as well as occasional scriptural blessings..

I applaud and respect people that can keep some anonymity on blogs they write..There are way too many wackos out there ( message boards) that just want to hurt and deestroy,,Itrs sad..(Sorry for the ramble)

Tim Lones

74WIXYgrad said...

All were good discussion points. I want to thank all who have shared their views.

Those of us who are serious bloggers, and that is everybody in the comments above, realize that we should respect the privacy of others in order to get along in the blogging community.

I have had to change personal policies several times since I started this blog, mainly to respect the wishes of others. It's always a privacy issue.

Amias said...

I couldn't agree more. Nosy folks sometime find themselves in a heap of hot water .. because while they are tracking down others, they leave themselves open to be tracked.

Good post!

74WIXYgrad said...

Amias that was a great point and I'm glad you joined the discussion. I know you claim to hide behind a mask, but you make no attempt to hide your identity.

Isn't it something how we sometimes get the most participation when we just take a couple of minutes to reveal our hearts.

And I also need to take some time to visit you, Amias.

J-Online said...

Thanks so much Cliff. You know we will stay in touch! And just so you know, I'll be popping back up soon. I'll make sure you know it's me! Hugs, Jenn